If world war 3 happened it would most likely be between us and China. The war would take for ever for us to win (if we did) because the Chinese have like 2 billion people. But we would also have many allies so we would win eventually. So this U.S.A. owns deal with it China/North Korea.
First off it cant be any one from DC, so I'd have to go with the punisher because he's got military training. He has almost no morals so he'll kill just about every one. He has no family or girlfriend or wife he has to worry about protecting. And plus he has a skull on his shirt, he is basically the grim reaper with skin on him.
Family Guy is the funniest out of the three because, the Simpson's are so old the show has run its course, in South Park you can't understand half the people. So that leaves Family Guy a show with great characters and awesome jokes it is probably the funniest show on television.