This is as true as true gets but Id love to get the ladies point of view about this

P.s any girl who says it ain't so is most likely fat and unattractive and would take any man, even though he is nice and nerdy

An article from this week's San Antonio Current, a most badass local newspaper. It gives a pretty compelling theory of why girls seem to go for bad boys, and it fits both modes of my experience.

I wrote to you last year regarding my own personal problems involving women upon entering my senior year. Now a proud high-school graduate, I can say your advice helped to make my last year one not completely lacking female promiscuity. That said, I’m writing you with a new question, seeing as you were very helpful last time.

A friend of mind showed me an entry from an article online which offered an explanation for why many women are attracted to the jerk rather than the nice guy:

“It’s not because women like jerks. Women prefer polite over rude, and attentive over distracted. The problem is the way nice guys present these positive characteristics. In order to appear friendly and romantic, these ‘nice guys’ think they have to turn off their sexuality. They hide their desires in order not to offend, presenting an androgynous, asexual persona. The first impression they give is one of emasculation, weakness, and lack of desire. At best, they confuse the woman as to whether they even find her attractive. That’s what jerks offer women that nice guys don’t: They’re not afraid to be sexual.”

Upon reading this, it immediately made sense, and seemed to be the plausible truth, but from what I’ve learned through experience when it comes to being sexual with women, one of two things happen. Either the women become disgusted and creeped out, labeling you a pervert, or they are fairly amused, but then never take you seriously, especially when it comes to romantic engagement.

Now, I also started to think that maybe It was something wrong with me, that I wasn’t “doing it right” in some way.

So, even though I know you don’t have some master formula for how to balance your sexuality in conversation with women, I was wondering what your opinion on the whole theory is, and if any, what basic rules could you offer to anyone debating the mechanics to such an approach.

— A Charlie Brown Who Still Has Some Balls

Dear Charlie With Balls,

I am delighted to hear that my advice helped you get a little action during your senior year. Well done! I think you will definitely enjoy college. Now I will share with you the precise master formula for scoring chicks. It is an ancient Chinese secret passed down from gay man to gay man over the centuries. You can also read it on the back of a Calgon box: Women (excluding most lesbians) want dick, you just have to sell it.

Just kidding. Kind of.

If I had to pick one mostly universal attribute of non-threatening appeal, it would be “charming.” It is gentlemanly, yet has an undercurrent of sex appeal. I agree that a guy can overcompensate with the graciousness and end up appearing uninterested or even asexual, but graciousness can also be a key ingredient in “irresistible.” Just employ a balance, as you mentioned. Make sure the lady knows you are interested, but treat her with respect. This is what we call flirting. You have to learn how to read women and respond accordingly. Use your past experiences to help guide you. Never be crass with a woman until you know she’s a freak and likes that. You don’t know she likes it till she says she does or you’ve already done it, and even then make sure she said she likes it before you whisper nasty nothings in her ear.

Until you know a woman you’re interested in well enough to be totally forward, make your advances direct yet not trashy. You are trying to have an intimate date, not pick up a hooker. Be physical, but not gropey. If you grab her tit the first time you give her a kiss, she is going to slap your ass and call you a perve. Unless she’s totally easy and then she’ll slap your actual ass and call you naughty.

Movies are another awesome way to get ideas. Mostly ideas you shouldn’t try because in real life there is no script for the woman to follow. But knowing what not to do is more helpful than suggestions for what to do in this type of situation. Learn from others and fiction, and make up the rest on your way.

Much charm and luck,

Your Uncle Mat

lol,

human beings don't know what they like, that's the problem. A girl can have a bad boy, sure enough she'll want a good boy, then she'll get bored of the good boy. Guys do the same thing.

I like my guys to be rough around the edges, and I like sack sessions to be more than a little rough. I particularly enjoy biting, but I've nothing against hitting.

I don't think a "bad boy" can't be nice. I won't deal with being mistreated, but I need things to be a little wild, and I can't have things being static. Maybe it's my youth. But as long as he's honest, a bad boy is just what I like.

Personally, I've never dated a "Bad boy," never been attracted to them, and never firsthand dealt with one. I understand their "game" too much to let them pry on me, but I also understand the girls going after them and thinking there's nothing wrong with those guys. And indeed, it is pretty fked up that girls can be THAT ridiculous. There reason behind girls going for bad boys is psychological, bottom line. Typically, they have low self-esteem, low self-worth, and some of them, are just doing/dating the guys they feel they're suppose to be dating because of the way they grew up. There's actually tons of cases of girls that are sexually abused as children and teenagers, that are the highest victims of asshole men, as well, getting eating disorders, dancing in strip clubs, doing prostitution, drugs, etc. The point is, by dating a guy who treats them that way, they actually believe they should be treated the way they're getting treated. Because, unfortunately, probably half of the men (at least) on this planet, grow up seeing and believing that is the way they are to treat women, and those women grow up believing that's just the way a relationship should be. But ya, the bad boys do get more girls because they're like pedophiles in that they go on a hunt for their next victim as soon as they get rid of the current one. Nice guys, naturally, would like to remain with the first awesome girl they find.

Oh, and on a side note, I've heard/read a ton of crap about nice guys actually complaining and bitching they don't get girls and calling themselves "too nice," and then there's a whole of nonsense that they need to turn into a douchebag if they want girls, and seriously, it's the most annoying crap I have ever read. You nice guys need to just get the facts straight and lose the desperation. In fact, I'll say the desperation and whinyness that seeps from those words (above) is why they're not getting girls at all. Do ya think a nice and intelligent girl actually wants to be with a guy who's whining that he's not getting laid all the time like the asshole next to them? No. Just had to get that out of my system. :-)

They may get their fair share of girls but look at what they're getting! The girls they get are those I wouldn't take to a diner for water!

When it's just sex, yes.

I used a nice guy, to get his bad boy friend. I felt bad about it but the second I met the bad boy I just knew I had to have that.

But for relationships, no. I like a guy who respects and cares for his mother.

I like boys with strong convictions, and convicts with perfect diction. I like boys who like their mothers....

:D

"more girls"?

I thought we only needed one.

You can still love your mom and be cool. Look at me, I'm kick ass. (;

And who says I want a girl who likes criminals!?

In conclusion you can be cool without being bad.

Guys who are sensitive are more attractive because they respect you and you feel safe with them.

Besides, how can you spend time with him if he's always getting in trouble and going to detention or something?