Happy birthday, America! Ain't this a great country, or what?
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We went and bootlegged bottle rockets from Arkansas to Oklahoma. Then we used pipes as rocket launchers and had bottle rocket wars. Luckily, we all still have both eyes. 1
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Crime happens. We COULD have hired private cops, but we went for SOCIALISM instead. Hello Americans, When I was a kid, we would decorate our bicycles with red white and blue crepe paper, and stick a playing card in the spokes so we could make a lotta noise.. What stuff did you do? excon Your DELUSION in your own words !!!!!!!!!!!!!! LMMFAO 1
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When I was a kid, every Fourth of July, we would go to Coronado and watch the parade. There were always lots of horses in the parade. At the time, they were the source of the only things I really appreciated about the event. What I liked about the horses had to with when the horses crapped in front of us. Watching them drop a load of digested hay was cool enough, but then clowns would put daisies in the horse turds so that they would stick up like the flowers were growing out of them. I thought that was funny. So did the clowns. Best of all was watching the marching bands going past through a parade route mined with horseshit. The military marching bands would have immaculately pressed pants, shined shoes, and the Marine band had white spats. They were so ordered and disciplined, and probably unaware of the hazards. Even if they had known, they would have been unable to sidestep, or step over the piles without breaking the perfect order and rhythm of the marching. I would sit on the curb, enthralled, reveling in the suspense of waiting to see if any of the marchers stepped in the shit. I have one particularly vivid memory of watching a shined shoe kick through a horse turd, splattering the crisp pants of the man ahead of him, and then seamlessly marching on with brown spatters on white spats. God bless America! |
