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Should we practice forgiveness?
I was recently told of an African tribe that does the most beautiful thing.
When someone does something hurtful and wrong, they take the person to the center of town, and the entire tribe comes and surrounds him. For two days they’ll tell the man every good thing he has ever done.
The tribe believes that every human being comes into the world as Good, each of us desiring safety, love, peace, happiness.
But sometimes in the pursuit of those things people make mistakes. The community sees misdeeds as a cry for help.
They band together for the sake of their fellow man to hold him up, to reconnect him with his true Nature, to remind him who he really is, until he fully remembers the truth from which he'd temporarily been disconnected: "I AM GOOD".
Posted at Dharma Comics by Leah Pearlman, founder of The Happiness Institute.
I think this is a really good idea. If I lived in this place I would hurt people and do all kinds of bad things. It's a good way to get all kinds of praise from everyone. Nothing like positive re-enforcement for bad behavior.
It's for your sake in that you don't have to hold grudges over every person you know. Believe me, you don't want to be the person who always holds grudges. I have a neighbor who does that, and I just gave up coming in any contact in her.
Yes, because the Lord wants us to forgive, even when it's hard. It's true, guys, that everyone makes mistakes. Our list of all the bad things we do could be ten times bigger than the list of them. If someone won't stop every time you forgive them, talk it out with them. There's a cool new word called motivation. It means the reason behind why someone does something. They could have stress and then take it out on you. Who knows? Talking and forgiving is better that mentally or physically hurting them, because two wrongs don't make a right.
There is a difference between forgiveness and letting people off the hook . Parents forgive their kids for what they did wrong but they still punish because it's the right thing to do , to never forgive someone is like drinking poison and expecting them to die . Honestly I'm glad those guys were punished , but we should still forgive them . What they did was horrible and they honestly don't deserve forgiveness but if the human race could just learn to forgive each I feel it could stop things like what Saddam and Mao did
Funny how you say there is no right thing to do but say we should never forgive Saddam for what he did . If there truly is no right thing to do then there is no wrong thing to do . And if that is true then you just rendered your original argument invalid .
Excuse me, but some people think giving someone positive reinforcement and forgiving them is the best way. And for the four people being a tribe, they probably don't stay there for two whole days, and they believe people come into the world as good, which makes sense, AND I'm sure they give he man or woman food. It would be sort of ironic if while they're giving him kindness, they're starving him. And yes, sometimes misdeeds are a cry for help.
If I hurt you, you must forgive me not for my sake but your own. Grudges are toxic for the mind to maintain, it will eat you up inside and erode your soul.
You don't have to say anything, just let go of what the other person has done to you. Less stress on your part. Which in return leads to a healthier lifestyle. So, I would say you should practice it.
What's the point of hitting another person if they other person is most likely going to get offended again? You should just confront the person and talk it over. That would be the nice thing to do.
Trust me. If I hit them they aren't going to offend me again.
The fact that they did something to offend me in the first place, is an indication that the person had no respect for me. They are not going to respect anything I say. This isn't an assumption, it has been proven to me countless times. I always use words first.
That doesn't seem rather nice. That just seems....petty. I think you should just stick to talking it out. You'll gain respect from those who actually have respect for themselves and others.
I've tried that my whole life and just kept getting the same shit from the same people. And didn't start getting any respect until I started boppin heads. They disrespect me because they thought I was a push over, so acting like the "bigger person" and just trying to "talk it out" just made me look even more like a push over.
You assume that everyone is rational and can be handled in a rational manner. You must be sheltered.
Well, that is unfortunate and I'm sorry about it. I guess we just live in two different cultural areas. People around here value being nice and rational while the aggresive types are shamed. Hopefully you won't encounter these aggressive people anymore so you won't even stress about it.
Did you already decide which branch of the military? If you go to college first, you'll start as an officer. If you go to the military first, they'll pay for your college. It's a win, win ;)
So if someone clotheslined your hypothetical 5 year old daughter, then said: "sorry, the bitch looked at me wrong," and walked away, you would forgive him?
Yes, I'm required to and what would I do? If someone was bold enough to do that they would be bold enough to hit me and there are enough girls being assaulted as there is.
Well....it wouldn't be the first time I have been called crazy. I've been called mamy things along that, but I am required to eventually forgive them all.
The Lord will punish them anyways. It's not our place to judge or hand out punishments. Plus, if they know what they're doing doesn't bother you, they will stop.
If it was not our place, then God would not have given us the means to do so.
Wrong. Why do people always assume that? I never responded to people's immature attempts to annoy me and yet they continued to pester me.
It's not me they are trying to get a reaction out of, it is their friends they want the reaction from. The validating laughter that relieves them of their insecurities.
What they need, is someone who doesn't respond to them. They need a punching bag.
I didn't mean going to jail as punishment. I meant using them as your personal punching bag. And you're not looking at them or doing anything when you pester them? Even giving a dirty look can satisfy them. Weird, because when I ignore my little brother, he always stops. I don't want to be mean, but my little brother is just as bad as the "people" you talk about. You could even say, " I don't know why you're even trying," and then walk away. Plus, they're just having another hopeless attempt to get at you.
I hope they stop bothering you though. (That wasn't sarcastic.)
Actually for one thing, yeah, because he and his friends come inside and he annoys me, if I try to argue he hits me, and if I ignore him he just talks about how horrible I am to his friends. That's not what your dealing with here?
No thanks. In my life, at least, that doesn't get me anywhere no matter who is bothering me. Anyways when I DO (I really try not to) I always feel regret afterwards, even to my brother.
Yes, but you could lose friends that way, and how would you like it if you said something mean and someone slapped you? And please don't say you never do. Everyone does.
I have not lost any of my friends. They know I only hit people when people do something very wrong. But I have scared a bunch of people away, but it was people who disrespected me and didn't think I would throat chop them...I warned them :l
They couldn't slap me, I'm too quick. :c
Even If they did slap me, I would love it. It would give me a reason to punch them.
Still, you are going to be known as the person who hits. It's not going to be pretty. Plus, the people who disrespect you might be jealous. It would be better to talk it out and even make a few friends. I know they might not be bundles of joy, but it's better than slapping them. Also, there is something called walking away. Hope this helps!
It is very pretty. The percentage of people who liked me, went up a lot.
You've obviously never been in the same types of situations I've been in, because if you had been, then you would know that trying to talking it out just makes you look weak.
Naah...hitting those buffoons is definitely better than befriending them...that's actually how I befriended most of them.
Walking away doesn't work if I'm just gonna see them again, it just makes me appear weaker.
Strangers never mess with me anyway, unless I'm walking and they're in vehicles...
The fact the majority of the majority of the people you speak would view you as weak for walking away for talking it out means you are being weak by doing the wrong thing just to be socially accepted . It would be very brave of you to walk away or talk things out regardless of what people think , doing the right thing even when no one agrees is a pretty brave act .
I'm not doing it to be socially accepted. I'm doing it so they will fuck off and leave me alone with my thoughts. Being socially accepted was just an accidental outcome.