A retarded rapist walks into an abortion clinic and punches a pregnant woman in the cunt.

Here's an anti-religion one:

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I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said "Stop! Don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" he said. "Well, there's so much to live for!" "Like what?" "Well... are you religious?" He said yes. I said, "Me too! Are you Christian or Buddhist?" "Christian." "Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant ? "Protestant." "Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?" "Baptist" "Wow! Me too! Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?" "Baptist Church of God!" "Me too! Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you reformed Baptist Church of God?" "Reformed Baptist Church of God!" "Me too! Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915?" He said, "Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915!" I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off.

I'll post more later.

Two men walk into a bar..................................The third man ducks.

Aman walks into a pub -he stands next to another man who has a Black Labrador Dog sat next to him. The first man says -"excuse me sir, does your dog bite"? - the man says - "NO". So the first man strokes the dog, the dog bites his finger !!

He says to the man - "Bloody hell, I thought you said your dog does not bite"!!

"THATS NOT MY DOG" replies the man.

that was uncalled for. please edit it or i will report you.

omg all of these are either perverted or anti-religion... please dont post these kinds of things!

Check some these out.

http://www.createdebate.com/debate/show/ Jokes_Anyone_Funny_and_Clean_If_You_Can

Try this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8qPrR49qsDc

I don't know about the funniest but I got a really clever joke:

there are 10 kinds of people in the world those who understand binary numbers and those who don't.

if you don't understand it post something and I'm sure someone will tell you

Here are some I really like:

-A man is getting a check-up at the doctor's office. The doctor does the normal things, like he checks the patient's temperature, and then he listens for his heartbeat. Doctor: "Why is your heartbeat so fast?" Patient: "I see your fees on the wall."

-Q: What do you call a man with a shovel in his head?

A: Doug

Q: What do you call a man without a shovel in his head?

A: Douglas

-Farts are the ghosts of yesterday's dinner.

Also, I've attached a link to a good site :)

So a baby seal walks into a club...