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RSS MouseMellons

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NO!!! Mouse melons are not good. They destroy the environment and your immune system. Mouse Melons are chemically made in the secret laboratories of North Korea, they are than sold to the American public at outlandish prices. Mouse Melons are smaller versions of water melons, or so you are meant to believe! These, so called melons, are actually made out of thousands of different harmful chemicals, and Pink dye number 6, which is a whole other topic I wont even get into. Anyway, Mouse Melons were created by Kim Jong (it wont let me type the last part) to be specifically sold to the American public to try to get them weaker and, ironically, bigger so they are easier targets for Korean soldiers. All of this has been proven without a doubt in the Witz survey from Harvard University. And even if all of those concrete facts weren't enough to sway you against the Mouse Melon, they are extremely bad for the environment, when the Melons aren't refrigerated, for extended periods of time, they explode with a fireball the size of a Samsung and a hover board put together! When they explode they release terrifying amounts of C.F.S.'s into the air and this could potentially destroy the O-zone, maybe. And if all of that STILL wasn't enough to sway you, the melons are pink with orange stripes! Not even like subdued colors, these melons practically look like they were rolled through the Color Run, which everyone should participate in. These are the reasons that Mouse Melons are bad and why we should nuke North Korea! :)

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