CreateDebate


Debate Info

36
41
What should i do? What not to do!
Debate Score:77
Arguments:43
Total Votes:84
More Stats

Argument Ratio

side graph
 
 What should i do? (21)
 
 What not to do! (18)

Debate Creator

starix(27) pic



I like a girl... </3

See.. i love a girl. And she considers me as a friend ONLY. We've know eachother for 9 long years, its only recently that i had this kind of a feeling.

any suggessions?

What should i do?

Side Score: 36
VS.

What not to do!

Side Score: 41

Okay bro, there are a few things that could happen (in the most common situation anyway):

1) You tell her your feelings and she doesn't feel the same way, things get awkward and you become more distant in your friendship.

2) You tell her your feelings and she has them for you too, you guys go at it for a few months, break up, and eventually stop talking altogether.

3) You tell her your feelings and she also has them for you too, you get married and live happily ever after.

Now I'm telling you the first point is most likely the one that's going to be put in effect, so this is the question you have to ask yourself: Are you willing to risk your friendship over feelings that may pass in a month or two? Is risking that friendship worth it if she really means that much to you?

In the end you'll never know unless you give it a shot, but it's a dangerous bullet to fire, that's why in the end it has to be you to decide, noone else.

Peace dude.

Side: What should i do?
2 points

Thanks man. But i can assure you that she'll never break our friendship shes not that type of girl... i am kinda her best friend.

and if i ask her out, even if she really really likes me, she is likely to say no. :/

so either way i am SCREWED!

Side: What should i do?
3 points

Tell her how you feel, the truth is generally the quickest resolve to a solution. Keep in mind, if telling her backfires, the worst that could happen is she would slow down doing particular things with you (hanging out, whatever you two do) in fear that she would "lead you on". This all depends on your relationship and how she deals with you telling her.

The upside is you'd get it off your chest.

Side: What should i do?
3 points

I married my husband after being acquaintances then friends for a total of six years. He liked me the entire time that I liked him. For quite a while, we were both to shy or scared to say anything. If you really are as good of friends as you say, you need to tell her how you feel. Either something will happen, or she'll let you know that she isn't interested in that way. Then you can find someone who is.

Side: What should i do?

be all liek... ey bebe, u r wantz to have mah babeez adn maek me sammiches?

Side: What should i do?
starix(27) Disputed
2 points

i've know her for 9 friggin years. :|

i cant be like that all of a sudden!.

Side: What not to do!
1 point

Go on vacation somewhere romantic or somewhere and just get away from everything and then talk to her about your new found feelings

Side: What should i do?
2 points

Honestly, the guys have already given you some great tips. But, from a girls point of view, I'm going to give you some tips.

First of all, every relationship is different, including friendships, and you know her best so you're going to have to decide what to do.

Secondly, I know this is going to sound harsh, but when a girl has a guy best friend for that long, she usually just wants that. You're a guys perspective for her life, and she wants to keep that.

If you really love her, you can start doing some sweet more romantic gestures for her and work up to telling her. But you need to do some of those gestures first to get it out of her mind that you're just friends.

If it does work out, then you guys will have a strong relationship though. :) Friends make the best lovers ;)

Side: What should i do?
1 point

Before I answer does she know?......................................

Side: What should i do?
2 points

yeah, i kinda give her clues................. i think she knows...

Side: What should i do?
1 point

Well if you've known her for 9 years then you must have a lot of trust. Make sure you trust her enough to not hold how you feel against you and talk about it with her if she really isn't in to that way then don't bother with her because you'll find someone else. You're only in year 10 so you've got a lot of life to find someone else. But remember in doing this you may make the friendship get weird it's your risk.

Side: What should i do?
1 point

just show her this page... she'll know how much u like her

Side: What should i do?

9 years and the girl JUST wants to be friends?

You've been friendzoned big time, buddy. Give up and find some other girl.

Side: What should i do?
4 points

Perhaps I've been brainwashed by feminists, but I really do think males complaining about "friendzoning" is a bunch of hollow sexist bullshit that relies on a double standard to exist. The basic premise is that because the male has put in time getting to know a girl, he deserves sex from that girl. The basic premise is that the male pretends to get to know a girl under the guise of being a friend, when in reality all the male was interested in from the outset was sex. And then the female mistakenly takes your weak attempts to get laid as a genuine sign of friendship, and becomes your friend. While I admit having your devious sexual intentions backfire on you in this way can be frustrating, it's not exactly surprising and any guy who tries to get laid like this deserves to get "friendzoned."

Think about it this way: Some girl at who sits next to you at school (who you do not find physically attractive, or think would be a good girlfriend) talks to you a bunch and over time you become friends. Then you find out this girls only intent was to get in your pants. Do you for some reason owe it to her to have sex with her? Does she deserve it just because she put in time and she wants it? No. Ultimately it's your decision, and if you want to remain friends with the girl instead of making things sexual you should be allowed to do that without being accused of "friendzoning."

Side: What not to do!

Tell her that you heard of a term..., "friends with benefits" and that you have no idea what it means. Ask her if she knows what it means. If she knows and explains the concept, then say..., "Hmmm..., so how good of a friend am I?" ;)

Side: What should i do?
starix(27) Disputed
2 points

lol, she knows alright. We even french kissed once.. boy that was really awkward!

and.. i kinda want us to be in a relationship.

Side: What not to do!

Well if you've frenched it sounds like you've already got a foot in the door, provided this was recent.

Also, you might want to try hitting the "support" button when responding to points you agree with, and "dispute" when you disagree.

Side: What not to do!
1 point

I personaly would see how it goes, just keep doing what you have been doing. If this feeling stays then i might do something about it.

Side: What should i do?
0 points

i've been trying that for an year. Nothing solid happened.....................

Side: What should i do?
2 points

I would not know where to go form here, i am not that good on the scale of girl firends.

But my best guess would be to tell the truth.

Side: What should i do?
1 point

You love a girl....pfft! You mean you want a lusty romance with a girl who might not want one with you.

If you are close friends with her and you two really click, you wouldn't be wondering what to do. You'd already have plans for the next cool thing you'll be doing together that you both already love doing together or have been talking about doing.

If you are going to have an awesome romance it's going to happen all of the sudden and with no awkwardness. Hold back those lusty thoughts and just be cool, joke around and flirt. Should the time ever be right you won't be able to tell who made the first move.

Side: What should i do?
10 points

Here is my list of what not to do:

Make a debate about it on this site.

Side: What not to do!
1 point

Not that this is exactly the greatest "debate" of all time, but I'm noticing a trend you seem to have that consists of you brushing off anything you don't like as something that no one else should care about either. Andy runs this site, not you buddy.

Side: What should i do?
0 points

Your over exaggerating, I made a "debate" that was a joke and from the up votes it seems that people like it. Do not mistake humor for arrogance.

Side: What not to do!

Here is my list of what not to do:

Make a debate about it on this site.

Side: What not to do!
3 points

Don't send her a video of you jacking off.

Terrible idea.

Side: What not to do!
3 points

will try not to do that..............................................

Side: What not to do!
1 point

Try not. Do or do not. There is no try.

Side: What not to do!
2 points

Don't TRY to start a romance. If chemistry is there, romantic feelings will be automatic

Don't be more into her than she is to you. ie. don't make her more of a priority than she makes you.

Don't be jealous of the time she spends with others.

Don't ignore your intuition

Don't lead a boring life

Don't make an advance on her unless it's totally obvious that she wants you to.

Don't use drugs or alcohol to "loosen her up" that's sleazeball shit.

Don't stop flirting with other girls

Don't be desperate

Ok I'm realizing I could go on and on

Don't heed all the advice you get :)

Side: What not to do!

Haha generally I find being a source of drugs and alcohol typically helps reel in girls. I never had more girls on the jock then when I was dealing. I wouldn't use drugs to "loosen a girl up," but everything you listed here is supposed to make the girl more likely to sleep w you, and it would be unfair to say gifting drugs and alcohol doesn't contribute towards that. Particularly if you're girls in the party scene; in that case, giving them a pill and a 40 is at least as romantic (and far more practical) than giving them a bouquet of flowers.

Side: What not to do!

Call it love when you just really really like her. How do you know it's love?

Side: What not to do!
starix(27) Clarified
2 points

I really don't see what your point is.......................................................

Side: What should i do?
BookBird101(574) Clarified
1 point

You said you loved her. Do you really? That's the first thing you need to figure out. If you just like her then if she turns you down, it might not hurt as much. However, if you genuinely love her, then if she turns you down that'll leave a scar. You gotta think of the consequences, positive and negative, and how you will deal with all of them.

Side: What should i do?
1 point

How old you and how old is she???

this question is a base to answer on thank you.

Side: What not to do!
starix(27) Clarified
1 point

she is 15, and I'm 16.............................................

Side: What should i do?
1 point

dn't shy away. she might probably like you back ;)

Side: What not to do!