Is suicide selfish?
A guy I knew, my ex's best friend, hung himself on Friday. With the amount of pain I'm feeling and witnessing, it's made me wonder--is suicide a selfish act?
Side Score: 44
Side Score: 55
It depends on why a person kills him/herself, among other things. If the person committing suicide is trying to end their own pain(as is usually the case), and if they have other people who they know will hurt because of it, then yes, it is sort of selfish. I'm not condemning suicidal people--it's their life, no one else's(we should do all we can to prevent suicide, but I won't say that a person who killed themself had no right to do so). Besides this, some suicidal people can become so lost in their pain that they don't even believe anyone would care if they died. Also, some people might believe themselves to be evil, and that society would improve if they died.
But a person might kill him/herself for another reason. There might be some crazy situation in which someone had to sacrifice themself...Okay, so that's a bit rare, but you get the idea. >_<
I'm very sorry about your friend; that's horrible.
Side: Good question
Suicide is seen as a selfish act because of the pain and suffering those left behind feel. This may be for many reasons, guilt not among the least. My niece committed suicide about a year and a half ago and the family has not gotten over this loss. She was 38 years old and in her prime. A fabulous fashion designer who seemed to have it all until she turned to alcohol. She literally drank herself to death and left us drowing in the aftermath. People have a right to do with what they wish to themselves but instead of reaching out for help, she reached for the bottle. I cannot imagine how she felt and I hope I never do. It's like being emotionally bankrupt and therefore giving up seems the only answer. Yes, it's a selfish answer but an answer nonetheless. I miss her every day and am still trying to make sense of it all. I don't know if I ever will.
There are organizations that can help people in debt or money issues. There are counseling services that can help people in distress. In a nutshell, a person can find help for virtually any problem. Suicide is a way out when you can't find a solution to your huge problems in life- understandable: you can't fix your life, so end it. But since there are so many resources to help people and suicide hurts loved ones dearly, I believe it is an extremely selfish act. In a sense, if you kill yourself, you are simply pleasing yourself (by not having to worry about life anymore) and hurting everyone around you. I still have sympathy, however, for suicide victims and those close to them. It is a very sad thing to be close to.
I'd say that it is selfish.. I Have been down that path also.. I was suffering from depression and all I could think about is how much better it would be if I no longer had to suffer.. Unfortunatly your friend didn't find his way out and I am very sorry for that! Everybody has someone that cares for them no matter who it may be if you kill yourself then in the end what is that person going to be feeling/thinking? They will keep questioning themselves: Was it my fualt? Wasn't I a good enough Parent, Sibling, friend? They may also because of what you have done sink into depression and go down that road you did so therefore you are putting someone in the same position as you were in! Of course when a person has those feelings they aren't thinking straight obviously so those things that I mentioned my not go through there heads at all but in the end when it comes down to it, It's selfish and thats, that mate!
Suicide is selfish. Euthanasia is not.
My sons father suicided 18 years ago.
The coroners report said he did it out of manic depression.
The coroners report also stated that despite him having a bottle of grog with him his alcohol reading was below the acceptable limit for driving.
The coroners report also stated that he had a few deseased organs also that would have eventually killed him.
But there was never a suicide note and still 18 years later i try to find reasons.
During this time he has been gone i have still not grieved completely and i never will , how can i ?
I felt crazy when i lost him and i would call his number hoping he would still answer , hoping that somehow it wasnt true .Even on the day he did it , when i looked at him laying their , i said its not him.
I went and saw a clairvoyant. I told her nothing . She said she sensed someone with the initial "P" or the name "Paul" would be of importance. I asked her what else she sensed on this person.
She said "sometimes he is all grown up , sometimes he needs to grow up"
I went white. She asked if i was ok. I told her the person she just sensed was in fact dead.She asked if i was sure because this persons prescence was very much alive.I told her i was positive.
She was silent for a bit and the tape started to grind in its player.
She said something that made me think twice about attempting suicide ever again. This is what she said;
"When he was alive he wanted to be dead. Now that he is dead he wants to be alive "
My heart still aches at the thought of him regretting his actions.
To this day i am still stuck with this love for him that cannot be quenched.
JUST THINKING OF THIS LAST BIT BRINGS TEARS TO MY EYES.
SUICIDE IS SELFISH.
i believe suicide is very selfish. when someone commits suicide all they think about is endng their own pain. they dont think about the pain that they are goin to put their family and friends through when they leave this world. there are other ways to deal with your pain besides killing urself. some people think that their lives are horrible and no one understands what they are going thru but someone is this world is goin thru something worse, believe me
Suicide IS a selfish act. Yes, the person having problems is suffering in their own ways, but they can always find someone to talk to. For every person that doesnt want to listen to their problems, there is certainly somebody that will. Plus, sometimes people keep problems to themselves in which nobody ever knows the extent of how bad it is. And every person has at least one person that cares the world about them and to take your life away, leaves that person devestated.
"Whatever pain you are going through, rest assured that the pain of your survivors shall be infinitely greater."?? Oh really? This statement is so sweeping and generalised as to be absolutely ridiculous.
SOME people COULD possibly leave one or more survivors who MIGHT end up feeling as much pain as as the person who took their own life, but only if the survivor happened to be a parent or a child, or a very, very close friend who really loved the person who committed suicide on a very deep level. But not everyone has children, or parents any more (all parents die eventually), or a friend who is really that close to them. I have friends who have had friends who committed suicide, and believe me they got over the death of the person who committed suicide perfectly well and it did not affect their long-term happiness at all. They felt sad and were upset for a short while after the death but there is no way they could be said to feel pain anything like as bad as that of someone who wants to end their life, never mind "infinitely greater". If you don't have a child or a parent, or someone as close as a spouse or genuine lover to mourn you, the truth is that no-one else's life is actually ruined because someone in their circle of friends or acquaintances committed suicide. Most of us are far more easily forgotten than we would like to think - life just goes on without us.
In my opion, i think dat suicide is selfish. Y do i think sucide is selfish, i think suicide is selfish because there are people that look up to u are u might be the only friend that a person might have. And if u cumite suicide that only friend will have no one 2 tlk 2 when they have a problem.
If that was the case, wouldn't that one friend be able to tell that something was wrong with that one friend? Or better yet, why wasn't that one friend there for the other when they needed it most? It seems that this one friend is the one being selfish because instead of thinking about what the friend must of been going through, they only thought about "now who am I suppose to talk to when I have a problem?" Seems to me like this "friend" wasn't much of a friend after all.
It's selfish, indeed. But above being selfish, it is stupid.
How is your life so miserable that dying is the only option? If you have nothing, have no friends, no prospective work, no family, no home and no hope... Then boo hoo.
There are children who were born with AIDS who fight for their lives every day. Women and children who live in prostitution with no hope of a better future, who live on.
What was this guys problem? His daddy molested him? His momma was an abussive drug addict? Whatever it was, people have lived through worse, and have become happy again.
It's the most stupid thing you could do, no matter how much you think it is your only option.
Side: ITS STUPID
Apart from being insensitive and rude, you are SO ignorant. Why might some people feel that dying is the only option? Have you not heard of depression? It's not just being sad and that's it, it is a HORRIBLE experience to go through, and most times, there is physical connection to it, a severe chemical imbalance in the brain. Ever heard of a 'mental illness'? Having a mental illness does not mean that you're weak, or have no willpower. It is an ILLNESS which can be treated, but because of its stigma (such as: OMG it's so selfish, like, why would they do that, like, OMG that's just so selfish and stupid that you'd kill yourself), many people don't go and seek help, which in many cases, leads to suicide.
So why don't you do yourself a favour, do some research on 'mental illness' and actually understand what you're denigrating...and be of some help to those who need it.
I just want to say that suicide is selfish.
HOWEVER, people that would rather have someone suffer through a life that they want to end are being more selfish. Everyone needs to be selfish to some extent, and everyone has needs. If someone is suffering enough to end their own life, I think that it is less selfish of them to do so than it is for others to ask them to stay, so that they do not have to suffer pain.
Beliveyoume, I am sorry for your loss. However, though you are hurt and sad and mourning, do you want to die? Are you so unhappy that you would rather do anything than live? You aren't feeling as bad as they were, and you are not as miserable as they were.
Imagine how much more pain you would need to feel to end your own life- and that's what he was living through, every day. Could you do that, every day? Would you want to?
You do make a good point.. But when a person is suffering that bad HELP is needed they may not want it at the time but everybody and anybody has potential to be anything they desire and work hard for in the long run this person could end up being very happy with there lives when you feel you want to comitte suicide thats when you have to and anybody that knows has to acknowlage that you need help urgently! You may not want to suffer anymore but what good is killing yourself going to do.. You are gone theres nothing left of you but a memory.. It would be better and wiser to continue living despite the tribulation you may have to face any hard situation is going to be a bad one but lives hard if you learn to endure what you suffer in the end you'll have a much better outcome
Sometimes even when we receive help,the pain doesn't go away. I have heard of stories where someone was sexually abused as a child and later became involved with drugs and alcohol, then received help, was clean for eight years and then got right back into drugs and in and out of psychiatric care and finally decided they had had enough. You cannot really judge a person's act as selfish or not unless you understand what the person is suffering from. Or say they are unwise because they made attempts. Suicide is a mental illness, it is an illness that we cannot visually see, or catch through an x-ray or ultrasound. We do not always notice a person is suffering until they have made an attempt or if they are no longer with us.
Xander you have expressed your argument very well. I could not have put it better myself. Whilst suicide could well be said to be a selfish act in most circumstances, it is surely more selfish to expect someone to continue with a life they find unbearable to spare the survivors an almost certainly lesser pain. The degree of selfishness of the suicide also depends on how close and/or dependent their survivors are. It must surely seem more selfish for the parent of a young child to commit suicide, but even then we should not be too quick to judge, because a deeply depressed person could easily be convinced that their child is better off without them.
A person who commits suicide is ending their own pain, but creating massive amounts of pain for those around them. Despite this indisputable fact, I realize that a suicidal person isn't going to end their own life spur of the moment, and that it's a calculated, planned action (usually). I know Tom didn't want to cause anybody else pain. I don't believe what he did was selfish.
omg!!!....i think that sucide is the most selfish thing that anyone can ever do!! because there isn't anything in this world bad enough to take your own life away. it is also really selfish because your not thinking what it is going to do to everyone who loves and cares about you. yeah people who commit sucide think that there isnt anyone in the world that cares about them but everone in the world has someone that cares about them and they make think other wise but they are wrong because everyone has at least one person in this world that cares about them. so in my opinion yes sucide is THE MOST SELFISH THING THAT ANYONE COULD EVER DO!!!!!
Side: yes it so stupid
Suicide is never selfish. Although I used to think that suicide was a selfish act, that all changed when I went through months of severe depression. People think that depression is caused by losing a job or relationship but that is definately not depression. Yes that will bring people down and make them frustrated, but they are almost always able to get back up. But when you are seriously depressed, it is caused by something chemically wrong with your brain. Whether there is a blockage of serotonin or too much, it can really keep you from feeling any kind of happiness. Pain and hopelessness are the only things that they really feel. The sad thing is that most all people who commit suicide don't think that they can ever feel better or get real help for the worthlessness they feel. I knew that there was something totally wrong with me. I stopped caring about everything that I used to. (friends, sports, girls, etc.) I am so glad that I sought help because I am finally back to myself. Even though I am now happy and excited about life again, I STILL KNOW THAT SUICIDE IS NOT SELFISH. So, basically my point here is that all the people who are commenting on how selfish it is, just don't understand. They don't understand because they have never experienced true depression and I am very happy for them. I hope they never have to understand and change their mind.
Side: You just don't understand
Acting in Self-interest is not the same as acting selfishly. Selfish behavior is defined as self-interested behavior that knowingly and unjustifiably burdens or harms others.
We never agreed to come into this world, so I don't believe we are born with any inherent obligations. We have obligations to society because we used the comforts and securities that society provides. However, when one chooses to remove herself from society, the foundation (reciprocity) of these obligations are no longer there. We, in fact, do incur some obligations in course of our lives, i.e. having a child, that makes suicide selfish, but that makes this issue contextual. For most cases I believe suicide not to be selfish.
Generally it is not view as selfish if one decides to end a non-parental relationship (romantic or otherwise). This action is definitely done in self-interest and harms others ( via heart break and unrequited love), but is justified because generally people believe in a level of individual autonomy. With freedom of association, one could choose to remove herself from society and become a hermit for the rest of her life and not be viewed as selfish. Death seems to be the only significant difference between that and suicide. If it is not viewed as selfish for someone not to live up to her parent's expections of becoming a doctor, or a raising a family, than why is it viewed as selfish is someone decides not to live up to her parents expections of living a full life. If you truly care about someone you should respect their own aspirations and not impose your own expections on them. This being said I believe most people who attempt suicide are suffering from mental illness and death is not what they would choose under normal . conditions. That is more of an issue of lack of sound judgement on their part rather than selfishness.
i suppose it can be more or less, but what would be more selfish would be to demand that someone live their lives in emotional or physical anguish because it might inconvenience you for a while if they died. we are all going to die at some point anyway. if someones suicide hurts you so much, you can always kill yourself too. were Romeo and Juliet selfish?