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Debate Info

5
18
Yes, monitoring is good. No, monitoring is bad.
Debate Score:23
Arguments:28
Total Votes:24
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Argument Ratio

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 Yes, monitoring is good. (2)
 
 No, monitoring is bad. (12)

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checkyofacts(8) pic



Parental "Cyber-Spying" - Is it necessary?

In today's technology-filled world, it is impossible for our children to stay off the internet (unless you live out in the middle of nowhere or you keep your kid in a bunker, in which case this debate isn't for you). Because of this, many parents have taken it upon themselves to monitor their child's online activity -- from what cat video they Googled at 11PM last night to who they're texting right now.

I'm here to ask what your opinion is. Should parents crack down on kids' online activity, or should they be more lenient and trustworthy?

Here are some possible topics of discussion: device ownership, child age, child maturity, parental familiarity with technology, mistrust, parent-child relationships, internet safety talks, etc.

Yes, monitoring is good.

Side Score: 5
VS.

No, monitoring is bad.

Side Score: 18
1 point

For me kids are allowed spend way too much time on the internet and leaving aside how much time and what they're being exposed to for a minute ; over indulgence is leading to other issues as in the physical health of the child .

Obesity levels in children are getting higher by the year as kids come home from school and slump in front of the internet for a few hours ;my generation of classmates were all thin and fit and indeed an obese child was a rarity in my schooldays , look at it now overweight kids are the new norm it's rare I see kids partaking in sports in any of my local parks as it eats up valuable internet time .

Either way kids need to have age restrictions when on the internet and indeed time limits .

Side: Yes, monitoring is good.
2 points

A better (but harder) option is to transfer brains to machines, so that there are no physical restrictions on actions.

Side: No, monitoring is bad.
checkyofacts(8) Disputed
1 point

Hi Dermot,

I see that you strongly oppose overuse of the internet, and your prime excuse is child obesity.

I believe that, with sufficient discussion, parents can teach their kids healthy living habits that they can then use in their own lives. For some, this may seem unattainable, however I know that this worked out fine for me as a child.

I think that you are only looking at the negative as well. Well over half of my high school participates in some form of physical activity, most of them participating in the sports programs we have, while still maintaining interest and activity on the internet.

For some, it may consume their daily lives, however I do think that that is representative of the parents teaching skills (there are exceptions to this, such as kids knowing its not good but being involved in online groups or programs that require extended access. This can be discussed as well.)

Anyways, bottom line, too many limits and "laws" begins to feel authoritarian and overruling, rather than building trust. I know that this is, stereotypically, a very "liberal" thing to do (in reference to "limiting the limits"), however I think that integrating this form of trust is essential to a healthy parent-child relationship in the age of technology.

Side: No, monitoring is bad.
Dermot(5736) Clarified
1 point

Hi ,

Thank you for your thoughts on this topic it's an interesting question and it's great to hear differing viewpoints .

I agree when you say ....I believe that , with sufficient discussion parents can teach their kids healthy living habits .....

The problem is are most parents in fact doing this ?

If they are in fact doing this how come so many children are indeed overweight ?

Over here our kids are starting to hit un precedented levels regarding weight because of poor diet and lack of exercise .

Parents over here mostly both work as two incomes are really a necessity certainly if one lives in the capital city , time is of the essence people spend less time with kids and less time in family activities ; fast food and more indoor time for the kids and indeed adults who seem to spend a fair proportion of time also on social media .

You say I'm only looking at the negative ?

Well yes because I'm telling you the way it is over here and I'm concerned .

I hear what you say about your high school but what about nationwide are kids more or less active than 30 - 40 years ago ?

Are kids heavier than 30 - 40 years ago ?

I know for fact all my classmates were thin and fit and indeed the entire school mostly were thin ; obese kids were a rarity so what's going on ?

Again I get your points and it's all down to the parents unfortunately most parents do what other parents do , after a stressful day at work they want time to themselves a quick meal and TV or internet .

I'm 54 now when I was a kid every meal was sitting down with the family which to us was great , all meals were home cooked and we were all healthy and happy ( mostly ) I still set a table and sit for meals ; everything now is the fast and easy option which isn't always the best .

I'm also not proposing limits and laws I'm stating what it's actually like over here , if parents do not have set rules and guidelines regarding the health of their children well that's sad ; tragically they rarely over feed their dogs and make sure the animal gets regular exercise do you not find that strange to say the least ?

Side: Yes, monitoring is good.
1 point

It depends on the kid. Their age, maturity, behavioral trends, friends, enemies, social life, lack of social life, free time, all play in to whether they're likely to become victims or predators on the web. Indeed there are some who are at high risk for multiple reasons and in those cases i agree with parents keeping a close eye on them.

Side: Yes, monitoring is good.

My daughter is only three, so I dont have that problem yet. I do believe in privacy even for children, so I will try to kill my curiosity when the time comes.

I would rather ban certain sites, like porn sites and other of the kind, that way she doesnt see or engage in things she isnt supposed to without me snooping around.

I do realize this isnt a bulletproof plan. I havent made up my mind yet. It also depends on what kind of person she grows up to be, some children are rebels, others are not.

Side: No, monitoring is bad.
1 point

In response,

I think that your current decision to not snoop around too much is a good one. It builds trust with your child, in my opinion.

However, I also think that there is a point where kids should be allowed to discover that kind of stuff too. If kids grow up believing that it is horrible and bad and they're ignorant of it, then that could result in unintended outcomes. My opinion is that there should be a discussion and, if they can demonstrate maturity online, I don't really mind if they decide to look at that.

As far as the kind of people our kids grow up to be, that's largely in the hands of the parents. Kids tend to adopt many of the actions and beliefs that their parents have, unless they're attempting to be rebellious.

Side: No, monitoring is bad.
shoutoutloud(4303) Clarified
2 points

Very true.

And yes children should be able to discover things for themselves, but they start using the internet way before I think it is appropriate for them to see such things. My nephew uses the internet and he's seven, I would hate for my daughter to stumble across something disgusting at that age. When she's 13 she can take it but .. yeah, not when this young.

Side: Yes, monitoring is good.
1 point

Waw I cant believe your daughter is 3 already. I remember when you were pregnant. I have been on this site far too long. fml.

Side: No, monitoring is bad.
shoutoutloud(4303) Clarified
1 point

Hahaha, yeah I can't really believe it either. She's so pretty and cute <3

Side: Yes, monitoring is good.
2 points

Monitoring anyone is an expression of distrust in their ability to make informed, intelligent decisions for themselves. It is the supposition that you are a more credible authority on their well-being than they are. If you're a parent and feel the need to spy on your child, then that's a reflection on your own confidence in how well you've done teaching them to be self-sufficient.

Side: No, monitoring is bad.

In general, it is bad. Ultimately, the child is responsible for any effects of his actions, so he should be allowed to make his own decisions.

The only exception would be when there is sufficient reason to believe that something will be harmful for the ignorant child, in which case you have the responsibility to keep him from making terrible decisions. But without any sort of grounding or monitoring as much as possible - restriction isn't a real solution.

Side: No, monitoring is bad.