The missionary position should be made the official sexual position in the US
The missionary position should be declared as the offical sexual position of the US and should be manditory for all residents to know and use.
Also, asking "Quien es su papa?", "Qui est votre papa?", "Wer ist Ihr Vati?", "Wie is uw papa?", or "Chi e il vostro daddy?" during sex will be prohibited. English only people!
And with the lights off
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I go for the freaky-deaky
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This is simply brilliant. The call for English-only during sex should please the anti-immigrant crowd. The call for a male-superior sex position as the national standard is a corrective to much of the damage caused by the feminazi crowd. It is obvious that the missionary position is the only proper way to engage in sexual intercourse. It is good position for procreation, which, after all, is the whole point of sex. The man takes charge of the rhythm and depth of thrusting, taking the lead, as is his right, and "taking" the woman, as is only proper. Intercourse in unnatural positions is a crime against nature and many states in the US formerly outlawed oral sex, anal sex, buggery, or other unnatural acts, until the lib-tards changed all that. No sex until marriage and no sex unless its missionary style. It's the way God would want it. Side: And with the lights off
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First off orgasm is nature. You might as well say that masturbation is unnatural.... Which you probably would. Still you can no deny that you have never yanked it. Everyone has ... Even on accident or as a child. Why? Because its natural. FYI FEMALE orgasm makes it easier to conceive and female on top is the easiest way for most of us to achieve orgasm. Conception is not the only reason we have intercourse. We do it to release and connect. Orgasm creates a release of oxytocin which is the same chemical in the brain that is released when a mother nurses her child. Man taking charge making it a good position for conception? You sound like a crazy rapist! The woman carries the child, why would a domineering masculine position be a good starting point for something as delicate and feminine as pregnancy? You're support for this overtly Puritan and archaic view of sex is ubsurd and easily deconstructed with a few simple rhetorical questions. Since when is it mans right to "take" a woman. It almost sounds as if you're saying its a muggers right to drag a woman in to a back alley and rape her (as long as its in missionary and as long as she gets pregos). Why don't you just club her over the head and drag her back to your cave? Also, isn't America the land of the free? Do we'really need our sex positions monitored or standardized? Natural is free-will which your god instilled us with... No? So why would he want us to procreate without the free will to be sexually adventurous and empowered? Wait no... Would your all powerful God really be concerned about who is on top while making a baby? Probably not. Again, just a reminder America is a free country and no one has to live by your narrow and fearful puritanical views because we also have religious freedom. I'm sure if you had oral your views would change as God would never want to deprive us of feeling something that awesome. You narrow minded conservatives are really missing out on the best of pro-creation. Just because you've read the bible like a twilight fan reading breaking-dawn for the first time DOES NOT mean you know what God would want you crazy NARROW son of a bitch. I can't stress enough how narrow uncultured and uneducated you sound. I'm guessing in your mind science is all crap as well? Oh and English only would god want that you racist pos being that Jesus definitely did not speak English. I thought the whole point of Christianity was peace. Not pushing your views on others and "standardizing" sex. Side: I go for the freaky-deaky
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