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 To adopt or not to adopt? (3)

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To adopt or not to adopt?

Pregnancy is very physically demanding on the body, causing morning sickness, joint swelling, calcium loss, night sweats, etc. And then there is the risk of the pregnancy itself, which is a high cause of death for women worldwide. 

And guessing the genes presumes that's fun. I don't think I have any particular set of features I would deeply desire to see repeated. If its my kid, its my kid; I couldn't care less what it looks like. And when it comes to genetic makeup, the make-up is as unpredictable as adoption. And then what does having that knowledge do? It makes the parents have to decide between abortion or having a child with mental of physical disabilities. 
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2 points

True personal story. Although when I was younger I liked the idea of having kids I ended up for a long time with a terrible partner who was never going to be a good mom. So I talked myself into not having them. And in the process of doing that I added excuses like I'm not unique or prime physical specimen, and pretty much every kind of medical affliction is somewhere in my family tree, etc. And then almost a decade back I paid for a 23andme DNA test and found out there really wasn't anything particularly onerous in my DNA (I think psoriasis was my biggest probability, and that hasn't happened yet). And then my old relationship fell apart, I found myself back on the market, met my amazing wife, and we threw caution to the wind and tried to have kids.

Now, despite being an older couple who were just at the edge of being biologically unable to have kids, we have two, both tall and smart and completely healthy, and quite frankly way above average in looks. Not that I'm saying either my wife or I would win any beauty pageants, but for some reason our genes together make stunning boys.

So to answer your question, adoption is a noble and responsible choice which can bring great joy to you. But, don't sell yourself short. There is no feeling as satisfying as seeing your own biological offspring grow and thrive.

1 point

I need to clarify what you're asking. I assumed you were talking about adopting a child over having a child naturally, but then you switched to abortion.

Which are you referring to in your question? Adopting, or putting a child up for adoption?

1 point

I have two of my own and if we go for a third the child will be adopted. It depends on your age as to what is safe for you as well as if there is history of complications in your family. There is something special about having a baby growing inside, when you feel the first flutter, when you feel the first kick.....it's something that is a wonderful experience. It is painful, to be sure, but it is pretty neat. If that's not something you are concerned with then adopt! There are thousands of children out there who need a loving home and if you would prefer not to wreck your body then go for it!