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Marital Sex Or Pre-Marital Sex
Just note we are not discussing about making a law on it. This is not the debate for it. It basically says: Which Is Better? Or Would you like people to stop having pre-marital sex? Something like that.
Let's see: The National Post reports that 25% of girls 15-25 years old have venereal warts (HPV). Transmission is not prevented by condoms. It is a pre-cursor to cervical cancer. The daughter of a friend of mine developed cervical cancer from HPV and may never be able to have children. HPV is incurable. The virus is permanent and the vaccine, Gardasil, doesn't fix it.
All of your arguments on this side have been about unprotected, unsafe, carefree sex. This CAN happen in marital sex as well.
If people were careful, treated and given the appropriate attention to such diseases and sexual history, we wouldn't be having this problem.
I am not advocating specifically for premarital sex, I am advocating for being informed and educated before acting.
If you take a liking to guns, I have a good analogy:
Say you like guns.
You can have a gun and ONLY use it to defend yourself/family against an attacker (be it a human or animal).
OR, you can use it for the above reason AND for recreational shooting as long as you are safe while doing so. Taking all precautions with guns and the environments, along with being educated about the gun you have, it's safety and your safety.
1. You can have monogamous sex outside marriage, and non-monogamous sex within a marriage.
2. People get remarried. Some STDs are spread from mother to child. Others are spread by dirty needles. A marital sex-only society would not cause STDs to die out.
3. STDs would be far more likely to die out if no one had sex with anyone, ever. Why should we not advocate this?
Not really, you don't go threatening and spreading STDs in Marital sex,
Sure, it's uncommon, but you can do it if you wanted to. It's just as possible to threaten rape and spread STD's just as it is to threaten someone with a gun. The gun is a bit easier because you don't need to be close to do it. Nevertheless, both can be used in dangerous and harmful ways.
eventually they would die out if most people had marital sex.
The same would happen if everyone threatened everyone else with guns and shot them.
Oh and I also agree with what zombee offered in refutation.
What i see from you in this argument is mainly statistics. Some are laughable, as Christian propaganda cant be taken seriously in a debate like this, but even when they're accurate i cant really stand behind the conclusions you draw.
Automobiles, for example, kill an insane amount of people every year, or at least disfigure, disable, and maim them. You could look at all the very detailed and very specific statistics that prove this and conclude that staying far, far away from cars and streets and parking lots is the safest way to live. And you might be right. You will drastically reduce the risk of becoming one of those auto-related statistics, but you wont eliminate it (because people that abstain from sex also have the potential to accidentally end up with an STD, though its usually called a BBP or something at that point).
Or you could do what most people do and take it under advisement. Look at the horrifying and gristly statistics and endeavor to be a safer driver, to be more careful crossing the street and when in parking lots, but don't lose your head and run screaming from every automobile you meet.
For me, sex, safe as i can manage and as well thought out as i can plan, is worth the risk of possibly getting an STD. Or possibly killing myself. I've heard your piece before from health ed teachers, parents, and books, and i understand it all very well, but i dont like to let fear take the joy out of life. For you, the same doesnt seem to hold true, and i guess you'll have to decide if the toll was worth it. If the damage outweighed the cost.
whether you like it or not not controlling your sexual desires and not dedicating your love to one person affects the people negatively much more than positively.
Of all the things i said you go after that? 95% of my dispute was going under the assumption that your sources were accurate, but very well.
If i sourced prochoicedoctors . com (making it up) would you trust it to be unbiased? Studies, research, and the people behind them can all be bought. Don't forget that at one time 9 out of 10 doctors recommended Camel cigarettes over competing brands.
Continuing my metaphor, there's a lot of research out about the potential horrors of owning an automobile, but none on how awesome having a car is. Nobody compiles statistics on how people feel about the freedom to drive where they want, or how they enjoy having a more convenient commute to work. But those are definitive benefits, perhaps enough to justify owning an automobile, even though you could conclude from the statistics it would be safer not to.
And that is the core of my argument; I value my freedom too highly and regard repression with such contempt that i refuse to allow fear to cloud my judgement in this matter. As i said before, the things you say are things that should be taken into account when making a decision, not a reason to abstain from choosing in the first place.
In the first 5,000 years of civilization, fewer than 20 Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs) became common. That's about one every 250 years. In the last 40 years the number of common STIs has skyrocketed to over 60. That's a rate of 1 STI/year since North American young people started having sex before marriage, a rate increase of 25,000%. (That's not a typo)
Did you ever think that maybe these STDs were unknown, or not known to be sexually transmitted, I mean up until 1867 it wasn't the general consensus that microbes caused disease.
I would think that you and the rest of the man made global worming advocates would be happy that so many of the evil earth destroying humans are being stricken with the inability to reproduce and are spreading it to all the other earth destroyers. You should be celebrating. Its just Gods way of thinning the heard right?
I'm pretty sure I would have commited suicide by now if I had to wait till I got married... seeing how I don't believe in the idea of marriage. Although, I don't think I would've made it to 18 without pre marital sex.
... I am aware you are throwing out probabilities, (aka statistics) as i mentioned, and my argument is why is that irrelevant? You could throw out these "probabilities" in every argument, but when it comes down to it, you need to look at things from a realistic point of view. By just throwing out these "probabilities" and statistics, your completely missing the facts. They are irrelevant when it comes to every day situations where every single person involved and every situation is completely different than the last.
What do you mean? These statistics are facts and the people who belong in the numbers have testimonies . You see, this is just one, pre-marital relationships barely last, many of these relationships included sex. However picture this scenario, a couple break up after having sex they both form a new relationship and would have sex as well with other people and this might go on for a little longer. Research has shown that condoms do not stop all STD's. This way someone could be exposing himself to the STD's of many people through a single act of intercourse. This risk is decreased by Marital Sex and marriage of responsible people who know what they are doing. And this is the flaw on the try-before-you-buy argument.This study was conducted on a high school.
Of course pre marital sex relationships barely last, but like I said, look at the divorce rates as well. You can't expect these relationships to last, but you still learn from them. I'm well aware condoms don't stop all spreading of diseases, but, like i said, that's why we should keep children informed to make their own informed decisions about what they do with their bodies. I think just arguing against pre marital sex in itself is a lost cause, hence, why I stress it's important for kids to be informed about what they're doing. Telling a child they can't, as everyone well knows, is not going to stop them from doing so. And please, getting married does not represent a persons having responsibility when it comes to sex, someone who is well aware and well eduacated into what (or whom) they're doing, and except the risks they are taking, is taking on a role of responsibility.
Most divorces have been due to lack of commitment and faithfulness to the spouse. Most people who marry do not know what marriage means, if they knew what marriage was they would not have done it. A mother who raised their child well will not let him/her have pre-marital sex until they leave the house, they might not want them to, but they raised them and told them the consequences, this rarely happens in some countries.
Please, do tell what marriage is to you then? Aparently you know better than a couple who has made the decision to get married and have it not work out?
And okay, let me get this straight... You're telling me that I was not raised well because my parents didn't "stop" me from having pre marital sex while under gaurdianship? My parents gave me all the necessary information I needed to know what I was getting myself into and made sure I was well protected. If my parents told me I wasn't "allowed" to have pre marital sex, I would have done it anyways, but I would have been less informed, and probably less protected. It's BECAUSE my parents allowed it, that I was safe. They couldn't have stopped me. And i'm no exception, most kids are having pre marital sex! And what i'm getting at is, the best we can do for them, is inform them, and make sure they're protected... kids are natural rebellions! Tell them no, and they will do it. Pre marital sex is a thing of the past, people need to except that so that more of our young generation can be informed!
That's because the girls who practice abstinence who practice catholicism are afraid to commit suicide. Girls who don't have that religious view don't have to worry about commiting suicide. All I have to say is Catholic my balls :D
In regards to the suicide statistics: why? Why do so many people kill themselves after abortions or pre-marital sex?
It could possibly have something to do with a culture that degrades people who take part in these activities? If you want an abortion, you can bet you wont be able to get one without having "pro-life" propaganda shoved in your face, and once you do you will be made to feel like a murderer. If you have sex often or before marriage, you will be made to feel like a slut. If a sexual relationship ends badly (most relationships, sexual or otherwise, do), you will be made to feel you made a mistake it putting out, or that sex was the reason things didn't work out.
In my country, which is rabidly religious, pre-marital sex is also a sin, a crime against god, and even in a religion of self-loathing, the guilt many people feel over angering the man in the sky is no small thing.
Andy posted further down that a girl tried to kill herself because she had sex and the kids at school started relentlessly bullying her for it. The problem isn't the sex in this case, its the relentless bullying. Sex might be the target of the relentless bullying, as it is with all the more mature name calling and guilt tripping, and while abstaining from sex might be the easier way to avoid all that, I'd be more inclined to waste my breath trying to curb a society that thinks sex before marriage is wrong and doesn't refrain from telling us so in the crudest possible terms. A society that drives sexually active people to kill themselves for the precised sin of being sexually active.
First two paragraphs, in the intro: because of this truth that sin never delivers what it's promised. Not exactly a beacon of impartiality if they have to invoke god in order to make the things humans do a crime. Oh well, more of the same.
12 out of the 15 examples on the site involved religion, god, or sin.
Of the three that didn't, one was an excerpt from a book, and another described a case of rape. No shit if your sexual experience before marriage includes only rape, you might have a negative view of pre-marital sex.
One of fifteen was a genuine confession of regret, guilt, or heartbreak that didn't involve imaginary friends and imaginary crimes, like god and sin.
So far from persuading me of anything, you actually reinforced some of my points: your biased sources, for one, but also that the crock of bullshit and lies we call religion - as well as the very negative impact it has had on our society - is largely to blame for the guilt and regret that plagues pre-marital sex.
But if you want to pretend that god and religion don't play a huge part in those testimonials, sure, i can play ball: its mainly a list of people bitching about the heartbreak, loneliness, and regret that is a completely normal part of dating someone. Scratch that, a normal part of being a human being. People talk about feeling vulnerable. About being sad after a breakup, about a failed marriage, about lying partners, and about mistakes in general. Most of it exists in all relationships, sexual or no, and most of it exists in marriages where both partners abstained from sex before getting involved. The rest of it is completely normal.
You should also note, again, that people rarely write to tell the world that they have a normal, loving, sexual relationship and everything is dandy. People do bitch a lot, though.
But then we have this shit: But I worship an awesome and forgiving God. I know I shall reap what I sow, and that is the most important thing to know. I can't tell you how ashamed I am, all because of a few months of pleasure. Which is just all over the website you sent and does nothing but confirm that people are damn good at brainwashing their children.
Shame, guilt, remorse, self-loathing, disconnection from life and from reality, and despising the wretched human condition are the things religion thrives on, and, in the US, this poison has seeped perhaps irreparably into our culture and in my opinion plays a huge role into driving people to feel ashamed, guilty, remorseful, etc, which, in turn, influences suicide rates.
I do deny that it is damaging, i don't deny that when you open yourself up to someone and develop stronger bonds with them that severing those bonds is more painful. And normal.
And comparatively it must feel so much worse when the break up happens after marriage, as it does some 50% of the time. Is a 50% failure rate and an even greater emotional heartbreak somehow proof that marriage is damaging and you should abstain from it entirely?
And are you implying that when people in non-sexual relationships break up its all smiles and rainbows?
I'm going to stop attacking your sources. You keep trying to back up one questionable source with another, and looking into the founders, benefactors, and authors of the sites you send is just getting tedious. And my argument is just as valid if your sources are correct, anyways. So lets just do that.
"And are you implying that when people in non-sexual relationships break up its all smiles and rainbows?" nope, but no where near as bad and it is not scarring unlike pre-marital sex. Most divorce rates have been due to adultery or cheating. And a married couple who actually know their place love each other and more and have a low probability of divorcing. Marriage is bond that is harder to break. If you do not love each other and you are "married" then you are not married deep down, do you know what I mean? also the mistakes the divorced parents do can be passed on to their children. http://www.jyi.org/news/nb.php?id=352 Countries where porn is censored, have lower divorce rates. http://mfgmarriage.com/does-watching-porn-lead-divorce/
divorce can be stopped by, stop watching porn, cover more skin ( be humble) so marital infidelity can stop and remind everyone what marriage really, really is. Conclusion; knowing wat marriage really is about is when you really are married, in actuality, if you marry and you don't truly love the person, you are no literally married and bonded, you just attended a ceremony.
I don't want to research and devalue a 5th and 6th website of yours. Please stop posting them, and we can just go under the assumption that statistics are correct.
nope, but no where near as bad and it is not scarring unlike pre-marital sex.
Just from my own experience i know that this isn't true. If you don't mind me asking, have you been in and eventually broken up with several partners in both sexual and abstinent relationships? I have, and i cant really draw any correlation between the degree of heartbreak and the sexual status of my relationships.
Also, is your goal in life to end up 6 feet under, unblemished, unmarked, and without scars? If you don't use this body, this amazing tool we all have, you're wasting it. It's like you own a Ferrari but you never drive it, you just keep it covered in the garage. If you take it out, it might get a ding in the door or something, hell, you might even crash! but whats the point of owning a Ferrari if you don't drive it?
So... marriages that work are real and all the ones that don't are fake and sin-riddled? It seems like you're arguing that if married couples love one another, are faithful, celibate before marriage, dress modestly, and don't watch porn, all marriages will be successful. Which is, in essence, taking the human element out of marriage.
Also I'm getting a fair amount of research that says that abandonment, abuse, substance abuse, illness, mental or otherwise, bad communication or conflict resolution, differences in lifestyles, sexual incompatibility, different career goals, contradicting religious or political beliefs, an excess or lack of control, different ideas of how to raise/treat children, financial issues, stress, and boredom are all significant and repeating factors in divorce, and while most of those lack the "You're cheating on me! I'm leaving, you bastard!* response, downplaying them would be foolish. And most of them aren't unduly affected by sex before marriage. And one could actually be solved by having sex before marriage.
And, historically speaking, love is kind of a silly reason to get married. Marriage is more a social (and financial) contract than anything else, and the personal beliefs people put behind it are just that: personal. Chemically speaking, love is just a different party going on in your body than usual, and it's not unchangeable or constant or everything it's made out to be.
Well, it is not love by itself but love and this wish for a happy family which wants them to get married, they can't have children when they are no married because the child would be negatively affected. I was single my whole lifetime. I only don't want pre-marital sex, it causes a huge amount of trouble. Now here is the question which is BETTER, pre-marital sex or marital sex? I plan to use my "Ferrari" at the right times
Well, it is not love by itself but love and this wish for a happy family which wants them to get married, they can't have children when they are no married because the child would be negatively affected
Not entirely sure what you're trying to say here... except for the last bit. I shouldnt have a child if I'm not married? Why the hell not? What does a government approved, religiously based bit of paper have to do with loving and raising your child right?
I guess i can see how, in a largely religious world, most people might take a great deal of comfort in the idea of marriage. Security, commitment, and the like. But that doesn't mean that marriage is required for those emotions, nor to confirm them. Love, fidelity, and a healthy relationship are all possible outside of marriage.
Now here is the question which is BETTER, pre-marital sex or marital sex?
I'll never know how marital sex feels because I'll never get married. But pre-marital sex is usually pretty good. Most of the time its rewarding and satisfying and fun, and helps me bond with those people that i care about.
I can see how two virgins having sex after marriage might lead to the 'this is awesome!' response, and how a lack of previous partners to compare one another to might lead them to believe that they have a full and rewarding sex life. But losing my virginity outside of marriage was awesome, and every sexual partner i have had since has helped me to better understand myself, my wants and my needs, as well as those of my partner and women in general. Evidently my sex life has its flaws, i've made my share of mistakes, gotten hurt and hurt others and i have a couple regrets, but then, what part of my life is flawless? This all sounds completely normal to me.
Your plan for using your Ferrari is designed to eliminate all possibility of ever damaging it in any way. Im telling you that is an entirely impractical ideal if you plan to use it at all. Better to use it for what it was made for... driving. Marriage is more like idling it in the same garage, every night. You will never see anything new through the windshield, you will never experience the joy of driving from place to place. But, as you pointed out, you will drastically reduce the chance of your precious car every getting damaged.
But not entirely. No matter what you do you cant protect that car. The same with your body. You can still get an STD (drop the S) without ever having sex. You can still have your heart broken, still enter into a false, crappy relationship, still end up hating the person you used to love (it happens 50% of the time). But these are not reasons not to do something; these are reasons to do things carefully.
In 1960, there were two sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) that caused the greatest concern among medical doctors: gonorrhea and syphilis. Herpes was rarely seen. In the 1970s, one adolescent in 47 contracted an STD. Today, that figure is one in four, and there are now over 25 STDs which are contracted primarily through sexual activity, 50 to 100 different types of human papilloma virus (HPV) and perhaps another 50 diseases which may be passed through sexual activity.
About 15 million new STD infections occur each year in the U.S., one-quarter of them in people younger than 20. A recent study of 18- to 22-year-old sexually active women showed 50% were infected with HPV at some time during the three-year study period. A sexually transmitted disease is responsible for more than 99% of cervical cancers, and nearly all abnormal Pap smears. Using a condom, even 100% of the time, does not eliminate the risk of an STD.
And people ask me why I am do not support Pre-Marital sex.
... oh come on, be realistic here, you can throw statistics at us all day, and that isn't going to change anything. Marriage in itself is becoming somewhat of joke- if you want to throw statistics around lets look at the divorce rates. To expect any one person to "save them self" (however, i think that term on its own is quite comical) is just naive. Sex is something to be explored and to be enjoyed, it's unfortunate that disease goes around, but kids are well educated on diseases, how to protect themselves from it, and in the end it's their decision, and their bodies. As for the suicide rates, you really think it's fair to throw in pre marital sex as a cause for suicide? Pre marital sex is hardly the cause for majority of suicides out there! And suicide is such a complicated topic on it's own, two people can have the exact same experiences, and one may come out completely unharmed and untraumatized where as the other did not. Pre marital sex is going to happen, a lot, instead of trying to force kids into thinking its wrong, or that they should "save them self", its more realistic and intelligent of us to give them all of the information they need so they can make an informed decision on what they choose to do with their bodies.
While I agree with everything you said an am supporting your argument, a co-worker recently had her daughter try to commit suicide because she had sex as a freshman in high school and all her friends turned on her and started verbally and socially attacking her.
I'm very sorry to hear that. but my arguement here would be, is the soley because it was pre-marital sex? Or is the problem here with the lack of support on bullying and abuse. Young girls have sex with freshmen all the time, it isn't because of the sex, it's because of the children who are attacking her. Kids need to be informed, and have access to help in these situations, such as with your friend's daughter. It could've went down as a typical, every day teenage hook up, but kids are cruel, and there needs to be more awareness on how to handle bullying in schools.
Thats a problem with school kids, not pre-marital sex. Groups turn against their own all the time in high school and such. The alpha female in her group could've turned against your friends daughter for wearing the same shoes as her to prom. The daughter could've found herself shunned and ridiculed for that, like anything else, but we wouldn't stand around blaming shoes or prom, we would blame the asshole high school kids.
Your line of reasoning is the same as me posting spousal abuse statistics and using them to justify to myself why i should never get married. And then urging others to do the same.
You can only have sex if you're not married, at least according to the feminist fridge magnets in my kitchen. After marriage, you just sit awkwardly, or occasionally play footsie.
which is a problem with today's society. People are not showing love , sincerity and compassion as much as they used to. I thought feminists did not like pre-marital sex, hmmm guess I was wrong.
I doubt the rates are caused by the actual sex itself. I know they say that women can be disappointed by our performance, but they won't kill themselves over it. The rates are probably due to consequences, like STD's, pregnancies, etc.
Of course sex is intimate. That's why it should be done before marriage. Try before you buy, y'know?
Even if it was that won't change the case. First Sexual Experience: Most surveys show that the average age at which a person becomes sexually active is 16 years. One US survey revealed that 63% of youth aged 14 to 21 are sexually active. Another found that 70% of youth will become sexually active before graduation from high school. The National Center for Health Statistics conducted a survey in 1995 and released its results in 1997-MAY-1. It showed that 50% of 15 to 19 year old young women and 55% of young men have engaged in sexual intercourse at least once. The corresponding numbers in 1988 were 55% and 60%.
40% of women will become pregnant during their teen years; 20% of teen women will have a child. 1
That website is Christian propaganda. Really, what it's saying is "atheists have a higher suicide rate than Christians". Shocking.
Teenagers are curious. They shall have an urge to experience sex, such is the essence of sexual maturity. I doubt that there are many who, upon losing their virginity, think that they're going to be together forever and ever. They just want a drunken shag. It feels good. So what?
This argument works best for those who believe in "one partner"
While someone might plan on sleeping with only one guy, she could be exposing herself to hundreds of people through a single act of intercourse. Here’s how: Scientists studied the sexual activity of a public high school of about one thousand students. About half (573) of the students had been sexually active, and most of them had only been with one partner. However, when the scientists tracked the web of sexual activity among the students, it was discovered that more than half of the sexually active teens—without knowing it—were linked together in a network of 288 partners within the school! So if everyone decides to have pre-marital sex you could be having sex with everyone. (theoretically) . This can be avoided if you have marital sex, you can be sure you are having sex with one. Now I am going to break your rules. If you are having pre-marital sex with one, you could be exposing yourself to STD's of hundreds of people. So really "safe sex" is pretty pathetic in pre-marital sex even if the condom did not fail because you never know when you will break up and few couples actually lasted until they got married, but if they did not last, the ex-partners are going to have sex with others and this might last long. This is where there is a hole in the try-before -you-buy argument because if you keep trying you are making things bad not only for yourself emotionally and physically but for others physically. Do you see my point now?
here are a few testimonies to help me with my position: Another young person said, “I slept with many, many people trying to find love, to find self-worth. And the more people I slept with, the less self-worth I had.” Some people may argue, “Well, what if I really care about him or her? I think sex will bring us closer together.” Indeed, sex creates a bond. However, 80 percent of the time, the physical intimacy of a teen’s first sexual relationship won’t last more than six months.Couples who want what is best for their relationship or future marriage will have the patience to wait.
Consider how premarital sex can affect relationships. One high school girl wrote, “I am sixteen and have already lost my virginity. I truly regret that my first time was with a guy that I didn’t care that much about. Since that first night he expects sex on every date. When I don’t feel like it, we end up in an argument. I don’t think this guy is in love with me, and I know deep down that I am not in love with him either. This makes me feel cheap. I realize now that this is a very big step in a girl’s life. After you have done it, things are never the same. It changes everything.”
I think you'll find that 2 virgins having sex with contraception is in fact safe. And marital sex is not necessarily safer than pre-marital. Surely you'd be less willing to use contraception with one whom you think you know? Yet it's very easy to lie about STD's. As easy as any other thing.
Besides, pre-marital sex is likely more fun (though I couldn't say from experience, being the respectable chap I am).
Feminists, at least based on those I've come across and based on things I've read in feminist literature (I've dated several and its easier to research it myself than pick and pry at their beliefs), are every bit as interested in sex as their male counterparts, only they are also trying to resist a culture that condemns and shames them for that (sound familiar?). Reclaiming the word "slut," for example, by way of showing that there is nothing wrong with being a slut.
And really? I heard that the grass was greener back in the day, too.
I seriously don't see the problem with having sex before marriage. Especially if you're not planning on getting married for a long time.
It's nice to be intimate like that with someone you care about. Not because you're married and are expected to, but simply because you care enough for that person.
I think people should hold to their beliefs and values on this position (within reason).
Think of what sex means to you, as well as everything in relation (like losing your virginity, sexual history) and evaluate where you stand on such scenarios.
I believe you should only have sex with someone you love and that it should only be done if you will not regret it after. But this conclusion is based off of my values and beliefs about sexual topics.
if that is what you believe then you should have sided marital, because all of what you said=marriage. When you know you will stay with that person. Also marital relationships are more secure.
if that is what you believe then you should have sided marital, because all of what you said=marriage. When you know you will stay with that person.
You do not have to be married to be in love, be in a committed, honest, faithful relationship or to even be in a permanent relationship.
Also, my personal beliefs should not be enforced on the rest of society. I have a standard method for anyone deciding this question or sex in general. THAT should be applied to society, it allows them to assess for themselves how they feel about sex and sexuality; and act accordingly within the law.
So no, I should have sided "marital".
Also marital relationships are more secure.
Marital relationships are idealistically more secure, but realistically they fall quite short of that. According to statistics, your chances of staying married is 50/50. The divorce rate is 50%. Obviously it's not more secure, it's not much more than if you were to simply "break up". Especially if you have no shared dependents (children/pets), many states allow internet divorces.
Note: I do not have a negative/pessimistic view of marriage, I am married myself, happily married. But I'm not clouded by the idealism of marriage; which is why so many probably end in divorce.
Things have changed since the olden days; people used to marry at the age of 10, some as young as 5. I mean, what's the main point of having sex? Reproduction of course. And as long as both partners' bodies are mature enough, i'm sure its perfectly all right.
See they were married. Pre-marital sex is different from child marriage. And a research has shown that married parents have a different affect on children than non-married parents.
Enough has been said on the matter already, it really depends on the society we are in, and how one arrangement affects alienation over another though dialectical interactions. In general though, per-marital is not only the ideal, but the omega and alpha of sexual interaction.
Let's be realistic here and all agree that Marital sex is a thing of the past. There is nothing wrong with teenagers exploring their sexual desires... it's natural, and it's going to happen whether you agree with it or not. To expect someone to hold off from sex until marriage is just asinine. Sex is something to be enjoyed, and good lord, who wants to have sex with just one person their entire life? What fun is that? What experience do you get from that? ... and secondly, do you know the divorce rate these days? You spend your entire life waiting for that "special" person, and bam, 1 year later, you're left wondering why the hell did you save yourself for them? It's just not realistic to think that there's only one person in the entire world you should give yourself too.
sex is a good time(: i think its a new time, people have sex get over it. why committ yourself to one person you can do it with anyone without a preacher.
If you're sexually mature, why not use your junk the way it was designed to be used? Why wait for a government/religion to put its stamp of approval on your relationship status? Sexual promiscuity makes for just as fucked up an individual as sexual repression might.
Except sexual promiscuity ends with an STD on your penis and sexual repression ends with an alter boy on your penis.
What is the point of waiting til marriage? I mean come on sure its the whole oh waiting is nice but blah dee blah dee blah. Bullsh!t I believe everyone should atleast stick it in the cookie jar once to know if you will want to spend the rest of your life bowchika bwow wowin the same person or with someone else who can actually take care of your sadistic twisted needs. (example ie: Anal play, leather whips, needles, dominatrix, fat people, midgets, animals, and blood sucking insects)
you need to know what youre getting before you , sign your life away to the same person. try, before you buy. if you dont like what you road test, no loss call it a day, walk away from it. you need to see if you like living with that person,first if its everything you dreamed of, ok then. once married harder to disappear into the sunset, if not impressed once married, then escaping the ball and chain, or rope around your neck, can get costly with a divorce..if kids involved more cost involved and emotional heartbreak too. please dont be put off marriage can be fun, while it works of course.
there is a flaw in that logic, scientists have shown that if you have sex with more than one person in your life, you are actually increasing the chances of getting STD's if you have sex with someone who recently was in a relationship, you could be exposing yourself to the STD's of many people through a single act of intercourse, so the more you "try" the more diseases spread, not only do they spread, but the chances of getting infected by them are WAY larger. Also, many people who have had sex and broke up were more emotionally affected than those who have had a relationship but did not have sex.
having sex should be the final step in bondiing with a loved one. it doesnt seem like waiting until marriage makes sense. why marry a person that you are not fully bonded to. that is why sex is refered to as 'making love' . if one is in love, make the final step, have sex, and if the bond is made, get married. if not, continue on with the search for love and if its found again, continue to bond, then have sex. (not saying that strictly sleeping around is okay)
That is the whole point. In pre-marital sex you make a bond and it breaks easily. Marriage secures the bond. You can't just continue to break and connect bonds do you have any idea how hurtful that is? Finally, the more people you have sex with, the more diseases you spread, you could be exposing yourself to the STD's of many people through a single act of intercourse this way. This "try-before-you-buy" argument is going to increase STD rates.
You should never go outside because you might get hurt.
You should never get married because you might get divorced or have an abusive spouse.
You should never make any friends because those friendships might end.
You should never drive your car because you might crash an die.
You should never eat shellfish because it can be dangerous.
Do these seem reasonable? To a point, they're true, and i can back them all with statistics, but the conclusions I've drawn from them (abstinence) are foolish. Better to exert caution than submit to fear.
Because sex is a fun, pleasing pastime (like having friends, eating shellfish, and driving) and it satisfies our primal need to reproduce without, perhaps, actually reproducing. And because marriage is a man-made and man-changed institution which sex far, far predates and i refuse to believe it is necessary to have a healthy sexual relationship. The approval of a religion or government should have no sway on having a healthy relationship, and it only affects us to the degree that we allow it.
in this day and age, people are going to have sex before marriage it is just a natural thing, plus you test drive a car before you buy it, soo i honestly dont see what the big deal is if you have sex before marriage.
As I said, The try-before-you-buy argument is flawed, all this does is spread diseases, emotional damage and make diseases stronger. If you have sex with many people, you could be exposing yourself the STDs of many in a single act of intercourse.
honestly in this day and age no body really cares what the bible has to say, teens and adults have sex before marrige, it is a very natural thing not to mention someones choice!
Yes, and now we have AIDs spreading everywhere. The more sex you have the stronger you make STDs and the more you spread it, if you have sex with someone who is not a virgin and has sex several times before, you could be exposing yourself to the STDs of many people through a single act of intercourse.
umm, the fact that just because the young girl tried to commit suicide doesnt mean it had anything to do with being sexually active, girls can be virgins and still be called a 'whore'!
As many others have stated, whether or not two people are married is less relevant than whether or not they are in a serious, committed, responsible relationship. Best-case scenario, they're old enough to be out of college, are living together, and have been dating for at least a year. Regardless, I personally believe that when people are in college, they are responsible for themselves and can make whatever choices they want. But anyway, I am absolutely for the exploration of sexuality, and I think that everyone has a right to share that kind of intimacy with someone whom they truly care for.
