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RSS Bisexualmale

Reward Points:6
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6 most recent arguments.
1 point

Chaos?

Hardly.

I find it interesting that of all the ways of determining it,

you lean towards that interpretation of the situation.

Any reason why you got that feeling?

Even if I said,

"I'm entirely new here",

which in fact, I am,

would you believe it?

But now we're really off topic.

1 point

Forgive me if I seem off base but you asked:

"Which definition is truest to you?

Does mine suffice or are your thoughts different than my own."

I was offering my own definiton(s) and thoughts.

0 points

There are all different varieties of both.

It's impossible to group them.

The point I'm trying to make in all this, is simply this:

CHARACTER BEFORE CATEGORY.

Let's consider looking at a person's individual character and not the category.

Look at each individual separately, as a person, as a human being without labels.

And work our relationships from that vantage point.

One on one.

I believe that's how true communication begins.

0 points

Where are you getting your statistics from?

I'm reminded of the old adage; "Those with unfounded statistics, are liars." (paraphrased) And remember, the biggest theory on heterosexuality is one of conformity; that society, religion, politics has subconciously engrained it in those who are.

"The consensus of psychologists is that sexual orientation, in most individuals, is shaped at an early age and is not voluntarily changeable."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heterosexuality

1 point

That's assuming that all gay/bisexual men like hairy asses, which they don't.

That's a generalization.

You're lumping all bisexual/gay men into a category rather than treating each person as an individual. It's easier to categorize. Less thinking. Less work. The hard work is seeing people as individuals with their own separate likes and dislikes. This way, when someone makes a generalization about you, you can be quick to point it out. Would it be fair for me to say "Everyone named Joe discriminates?"

Also, your definition of a "typical woman" is your interpretation and may not be the overall consensus.

1 point

IMHO, The problem doesn't lie in the belief of bisexuality.

The problem lies in one's definition/interpretation of bisexuality.

If a common ground cannot be met between two parties on the said definition than an effective discussion cannot take place.

The most common definition is:

1. the ability/desire to have sex with either gender, excluding a relationship

This is based on attraction only.

The least common definition is:

2. the ability/desire to have a relationship with either gender, with sex being just one component of that relationship. This is based on attraction and an emotional bond.

Couple that with the varying degrees of bisexuality as well. Do they lean more towards one, or the other, or is it equal? Both definitions and degrees exist in and out of the bisexual community.

The struggle for some bisexuals is the struggle in defining what bisexuality means for them. Do they side with Def 1 or Def 2? And to what degree?

Our problem is found in the labels themselves be it bisexual, gay or straight. Here's why. When someone asks someone else "Are you gay, straight or bisexual?", they're not asking them about the emotional side of a relationship. What they are really asking is "HOW do you like your sex?" The next time someone asks you about your or someone's sexuality, ask them "What do you mean by gay, straight or bisexual?" After their confused look, you'll see my point. Press them nevertheless. Have them define gay, straight or bisexual. You'll see it more often than not that it will be about the sex rather than the relationship.

You can certainly have an opinion about bisexuality but if you have never experienced it, and not saying you have to go out and try it, then how can you honestly speak for someone who claims to be bisexual? You simply can't. You can only offer and project your own heterosexual experience. Just like someone can't experience heterosexuality if they claim to be gay, lesbian or bisexual.

You'll also find that many bisexuals DO pick a side when it comes to a relationship. They'll find themselves with the same sex or another. The problem there is once a side is chosen, they are immediately placed in the hetero or gay category and the issue of bisexuality, to the people around them is not questioned. (There are also those who engage in relationships with a person of their own sex and that of another. A triangle so to speak.)

The main problem bisexuals face is the presumption that its all about sex and nothing else. It's tough because "sex" is in the word itself. To a degree, the same goes for "gay" and "lesbian". (See above on "HOW do you like your sex?") But, its not so much the case for the term "heterosexual".

The facts are this: gay, straight, bisexual, lesbian relationships all have sexual components to them and for some, its all about sex. We can find examples in every category, gay, straight or lesbian where sexual promiscuity runs amuck. One category does not have the monopoly on that issue.

So what's the answer?

Do away with the labels. Focus on the inidivdual as a person, as an individual, as a human being, NOT AS A CATEGORY. CHARACTER BEFORE CATEGORY.

Ask yourself, "What is this person's character?"

If you put character ahead of category, you'll stand a much better chance of having a relationship with that person, even if its just a friend.

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