Good topic sentence, straight to the point bringing out your argument. Good explanation. Mistake: "For example, Protestants might be taught a different kind of history due to the different perspective in the past thus making them have a bad impression on the Catholics, vice versa. The study of history can cause disharmony just because of what happened in the past, and it doesn't matter whether the conflicting groups have anything to conflict about today." "The study of history .. detrimantal to the peace in the society." Good ending to link back to point. Good job! Short and sweet paragraph. (:

Topic sentence is quite good, straight to the point. This is a valid example but too vague. "For instance, new and better drainage system.." Which country used a better drainage system? Maybe can give a specific example instead of generalizing. Sentence structure a little bit weird. "Learning better war tactics.. and MUCH more have been done to improve the situation in the world and avoid the REPETITION of floods." Also "People living in Singapore.. AS FLOODS ALWAYS OCCURRED." Example of Singapore not very valid because the recent floods have proven that our drainage system is not that effective. It is the learning of past examples that showed the need of weapons to protect ourselves better and not past mistakes. Quite a good link back to point, cause you summarized the 2 main examples in your paragraph. Good job! (: